Has anyone seen where I left my contentment?

Things are going very well right now.  My son is all the way through his meds change and is finally doing well.  I’ve tackled a few money issues and think I’m right side up financially.  Work is going well; in fact I just got a raise with my performance review.  My family is good, mostly.  My kitties are good.  I’m good.

So for the life of me, I don’t understand why I don’t feel content.

Granted it’s not a feeling I’ve ever spent much time with, so maybe I just don’t understand how it’s supposed to feel, but I’m pretty sure what I’m feeling, is not it.

I feel restless, antsy, and impatient, like each day is moving past me and while I’m getting stuff done, I do not feel a sense of accomplishment.  I don’t feel bad, or down…it’s more like I’m craving some sort of problem to solve, some sense of being needed or necessary.  My thoughts are fractured.  Like in order to solve a simple math problem, I have to wright it down to stay focused.

I tried coloring, playing little games on my phone, practicing my Spanish, cleaning, but nothing brings me any closer to a place of contentment or peace.

I feel a bit guilty to admit that I’m not on top the world with all that is going right.

Anybody else ever get this way?

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5 thoughts on “Has anyone seen where I left my contentment?

  1. That’s great that you are improving your financial situation and you’re son is doing well with his meds. Have you ever tried keeping a written account of your blessings and focusing on them. When negative thoughts try to come in, chase them away with thoughts of your blessings or positive thoughts. I’m sure you’ve tried almost everything. Just a thought

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Yes, yes, yes, I so know what you mean. Sometimes it just feels like a gray cloud lingering over our head, even when things are seemingly all good. Glad I’m not alone but hope you feel better today. And wonderful news about the pay rise at work. Celebrate the good. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Miriam…I’m glad I’m not the only one. I know there are people that would be thrilled to be in my shoes today, so I need to be getting a little grateful before it all goes to hell in a hand basket!

      Liked by 1 person

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