Category Archives: achievements

A seat at the grown-up’s table

I have always believed that I could make a difference in this world before I left it. Even prior to my life going off the rails as a young adult, I had dreams of making a difference.

Unfortunately the derailment left me behind the curve in both maturity and education, which seriously shattered my confidence.

Since my divorce and more importantly since starting this blog, I feel like I’ve finally caught up in life and I’ve been anxiously searching for my direction. My way to make that impact I honestly believe I’m here on earth to make.

I tried many things to date including my Achieving Independence dream, but keep hitting road block after road block. Each time I’d adjust my trajectory, but up until a few days ago, it was still just a dream.

Then it happened….table

I got an email from a upstart company that read my blog and invited me to be a content contributor…or author on their site.

First, let me say that I’m a skeptic at heart, so I assumed it was the latest scam unfolding and kept waiting for the part where they asked for money. I checked out their site and it seemed legit, so I responded to the email asking for more info. We had a back and forth dialogue which resulted in me signing up.

The best part…they still haven’t asked me for money!!! 🙂

Then the reality starting hitting me in waves…

I’m going to have a voice.  

I’m going to be writing for someone else.

There are no limits being placed on me, just an open book to start writing!

It’s not a paid job, but there will be opportunities to make some money in the future. They seem to have grand plans, so money or not, if they become as big as they hope, it will be a platform for me to share my passion to make the world a better place.

So, worst case scenario, I start posting and nothing happens, at least I had fun posting. Best case scenario, it takes off and I have an incredible platform to share my voice.

It’s finally time for me to take my place at the grown-up’s table…

and baby, I’m ready!

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Three Day Quote Challenge

Thank you Pieces for nominating me for the Three Day Quote Challenge. I accept the challenge and will post quotes that best represent me on my present journey.

Rules:
1.Thank the person who nominated you
2. Post one quote for three consecutive days
3. Nominate three bloggers each day

First quote:

If you see me on the street and I am running, there is a good chance you should be running as well, because something dangerous is coming. I don’t run, I hate to run, I loathe running, did I mention I don’t like to run?
-Dr. Jekyll ‎@LunaticLabs

I want to exercise…I do, but I never do it.  I hate running and yet I yearn to run a 5K called The Color Run.  My first attempt to prepare for it, I walked off a sidewalk and nearly broke my ankle.  I couldn’t put weight on it for nearly 3 months.  It’s not an excuse, it’s just my current world.

As with challenges and awards, there is no obligation to accept. With that being said, my nominees are:

Dray

Miriam

MyAmbivalentExistence

Thanks again Pieces!

Liebster Award

liebster2

 

First I want to thank Soul Gifts for the nomination!

The rules for this award are:

  • 1. Post a short Q&A about themselves
  • 2. Thank your Liebster Blog Award presenter on your blog
  • 3. Nominate others

 

Q&A

Books – I just read Sue Klebold’s – A Mother’s Reckoning | Living in the aftermath of a tragedy.  I strongly recommend it to anyone who has heard of the Columbine shootings or has ever blamed another parents “lack of parenting” as a cause for their child’s actions.  I couldn’t put the book down.  It changed my world.

Movies – I absolutely loved the humor, both sarcastic and dry in “Deadpool.”  It is most definitely not for everyone, but when the opening credits list the producers as “ass hats” and the director as “an overpaid tool” I know I was in the right movie for my taste.

Hobby – kitty rescue.  I currently have…my 19 year old calico rescue, my 3 year old buddies a Russian blue and a brown tabby (one gifted by a moving neighbor, the other rescued from a feral momma to keep former company), a tabby that was formally feral with a broken leg, but is now the sweetest kitty ever.  A formally TNR kitty that adopted me.  Two feral’s that come for dinner.  Turns out before I could tame them they mated…so Tuxedo baby-daddy and Tabby mommy have five 2 week old kittens and yesterday I added a 2 day old abandoned kitten to the litter.  I might be slightly over my cat limit for my apartment. Shhhhhhhh

Nominees are:

Iggy

Rose

Arcane Owl

Thanks again Soul Gifts. 🙂

21 days

I’m sure that title conjures up different things for different people.

Like, if I said you had to start running a 5K everyday for 21 days, or quit smoking (if you do) for 21 days, it might seem overwhelming. On the other hand if I said you get 21 days of paid vacation on top of your regular vacation or get 21 days of rent/mortgage free this year it might make you feel elated.

So, with that in mind, I learned many years ago that it takes 21 days to make a habit and less than 3 to break it. I have no proof of the first, but the latter I can totally attest to!

In any case, I have used the 21 day rule a number of times in my life to force change in my behavior because, for me, I can hang in there 21 days, and even if at the end I decide not to continue, it feels like success.

So yesterday I started my 21 days of gluten free.

Up until yesterday I was merely dabling in it. I’ve tried new recipes and food substitutes, with both glowing results and my fair share of garbage can fillers.

I hadn’t completely given in to the fact that it has to be all or nothing with Gluten.

So yesterday was day one. I worked from home which made it easier. Day two, still fairly easy, I found bread substitutes and that was the biggest hurdle, so I kind of thought I was home free.

Then I discovered there was one tiny little habit I hadn’t acknowledged until yesterday that I would have give up. Yesterday is was easy, but today….it took effort.

My son’s pizza. Yes, my son eats pizza nearly everyday. Yes, I’m a horrible parent. Let’s move on, shall we?

Anyway, I usually cut a sliver off of one piece and give him the rest. As a rule I don’t eat pizza much anymore at all. I’ve been able to accept that even one slice is seriously hindering my desire to get back to a healthy weight, so I don’t enjoy it as much as I once did and I don’t crave it.  That said, that one little sliver was apparently a fairly ingrained habit.

Yesterday, I chuckled at the pizza and thought, silly me…I can’t eat that sliver that has gluten in it. After which, I gave it no more thought.

Today, it was mocking me. I sliced the pizza in small slices and after plating it really had to tell myself, NO!

I know it’s just 21 days and we are almost through 2, but WOW suddenly it seems a LOT harder.

19 more days, just 19 more days, only 19 more days…you are going to feel amazing!

Mindfulness through television

Over the years, I’ve read plenty about mindfulness and it’s benefits to those of us who struggle with anxiety. Unfortunely, it’s a lot like exercise and only benefits those who are consistent in practice and I’m anything but.

I found a funny way to squeeze it in.

I am using my TV time to be mindful.

No, I didn’t give up my TV time to be mindful, I’m using it!

I began watching one intense show a night (walking dead, x-files, etc) and when the action reaches an intense level, I check my bodies response. Normally, I’m gripping the pillow, shallow breathing (if at all) and all my muscles are tensed. So, I tell myself to relax and breath slowely while continuing to watch the action. While I don’t always stay that way for long, the fact that I am able to will myself into a calm physical state is a huge improvement over before.

Yestereday, I put it to the test. I was super anxious about picking up the phone when I saw it was my ex…and guess what??? It worked! I was able to breath out the tension and remain that way for the brief call.

I was so excited at my progress that it motivated me to get off the couch and walk again.

That was the first 20 minute walk since the beginning of January!

I think that calls for more TV…don’t you think?

Steering the ship

Some days I feel like I have direction. I know what to do and where I am going, and while it’s usually hard,  how to get there.

Other days, I feel lost, adrift in an unforgiving ocean called “life.”

Yesterday was a day of recovery. The last few weeks had taken their toll.

Today was the day that I pulled out the metaphorical compass in an attempt to start steering this ship again.

When I was about 25 yrs-old, someone in my business world sent me to a class about goal setting (BEST 1 day class I ever had!!!) Since then I have consistently set and worked towards goals. Small ones, big ones, medium one’s, it doesn’t matter. Some get axed, while others I eventually achieve. I always keep them written down because then every year around New Years, I can pull up the list and check stuff off, which feels amazing! Sometimes when I find myself directionless, I pull up the list just to give me a new start.

Today I pulled up my list for direction and what I realized was kind of cool. One thing I’ve wanted to do FOREVER is learn how to speak Spanish. I’ve taken classes, tried to learn from friends, and started the quest over and over again. I would get just so far and then stop for one reason or another.

Today I realized that I am closer than I’ve ever been to reaching that goal.

I’ve been using an app called “duolingo” for about 3 months now. I set my goal to two sessions each day which together takes no more than 10 minutes.

The first few weeks I felt a little stressed because some days my brain was NOT in a position to learn anything new. Then after the first month I realized that I could repeat a lesson over and over and still meet my goal without trying to learn something new when I wasn’t up to it.

Today I hit 61 days of consisitently doing two lessons. Even when I’m sick or depressed I do at least two repeat lessons. I usually do one during the 5 minutes I sit in carpool and the other when I eat lunch or when I’m trying to calm down before bed. More often than not, it was repeating what I had already learned, but by doing the repeat on days I was “off”, it allowed me to push forward and sometimes do more on days that I was feeling great!

I have now hit 49% fluency in Spanish!!! I’m so excited.

While this does nothing in the grand scheme of my life, it makes me feel more like the Captain of my ship today.

Carry on!